Five in forty-eight

Interactions with the last 5 men in my life in a mere 48 hour period. I'm exhausted.

Told Va Lawyer that I can only be friends. Period. That's it. I need to be clear. No, I don't want to fool around.No that doesn't mean we can make out for fun just because you think I am hot and we used to be good in the sack 11 years ago. You also used to be a good, um, 60 pounds lighter dude. Nope nope nope. And I also remembered that I broke up b/c you were dirty, and not that dirty that I enjoy in bed thing. Just dirty. Around the house dirty. Pizza boxes everywhere dirty. Dirty dishes from an entire week in the sink dirty. Dirt under your fingernails dirty.

The most important thing: Hottie got brave (real brave) and admitted that he had been reading the blog. I still could be crazy, but its not evidenced through me imagining him reading the old public blog.

Now, granted, he admitted this to me at my house at 4am Sat/Sun.
After he called me at 3. (That's brave. He didn't know where I was...I could have been hittin it with someone else...)
(After I tentatively answered, knowing I will look like a total putz in front of everyone answering what to them looked like a booty call. I did it anyway. Funny how much clarity you can get in those moments. Time slowed down, just for a few seconds, while I thought it through. And slowly, I took the phone out of the pocket...)

I need to digress here.

I was really glad he called. Really glad. I think you guys know that. I was waiting for him to do something sort of risky and out there. But I digress - so back to our regularly scheduled program:

After picking me up in Five Points at a late night right after that call.
After said exit from that house seemed to piss N off so much so that he dropped me from MySpace as a friend. Good thing I didn't book Barcelona.

I made the right choice on that one. No doubt about it. Even if I lost N's friendship, Hottie took priority. That was an easy call. And I needed that closure from him.

And Sunday morning I got to hit it again and well, you know we're real, real good in that area.

WHO KNOWS what is next. I am not counting on anything, and going to continue with my current course of singledom. I would like to think he'll get some therapy, and coupled with my shaking off the depression and gained weight, we might just could get back on track. But until I hear something affirmative from him, I cannot count on that. So...maybe eHarmony? Maybe just hanging out with people? Maybe therapy will make him feel a bit better? It's worked wonders for me...

Ran into ex fiancee again on Sat. night. He texted me and said that RS's ex hubby keeps bugging him to hang out. So RS, they were very alike!!! Again, felt nothing seeing him.

Oh that's only 4. Well, for yucks I included my usual calls with the ex hubby. So there's my 5 in 48.